Flipping the Hourglass
- Last updated: 11/27/2024
- Number of chapters: 2/?
- Word count: 6,533
- Genres: Action, supernatural, comedy
- Warnings: Graphic violence, strong language
- Characters: Alucard/Genya Arikado, Richter Belmont, Soma Cruz, Maria Renard, Yoko Belnades, Julius Belmont, Juste Belmont
- Other Tags: Vampires | Non-traditional relationship | De-aging | Children
- Summary: Soma's first official mission as Arikado's unofficial apprentice goes unexpectedly south when the latter is hit by a curse. Soma is left to try to care for his indisposed mentor, while Julius and Yoko chase after a wayward sorceror.
Many years ago, Alucard found himself on the other end of a very peculiar situation.
Prologue
Author's noteDon't worry, I haven't abandoned The Gang Goes to Hell. I just need to replay DMC4 and DMC2 and also play all of Curse of Darkness before I can finish it. But uh, it's fine! It's all good. Anyway, have y'all been watching Dragon Ball Daima?
As Soma stepped out of the house, knife at his hip, he couldn’t help but think that the weather felt comically incorrect for the occasion. The evening sun was shining, a cool breeze tempered the early summer warmth, and flower petals lined the street. A slightly battered car waited by the curb.
“Hey,” Soma announced himself as he opened the back door of the car.
“Hello, Soma.”
“Evenin’.”
“Heyyyy!”
“Oh! Yoko, Julius, I didn’t realize you two were coming,” Soma commented in surprise. He held out the large bag of 100 yen shop potato chips he’d been carrying under his arms. “Anyone want chips?”
“Me,” Julius replied, holding out a hand from the driver’s seat.
Soma pulled open the bag, placing it on the center console. He buckled his seatbelt before reaching for a few himself.
Arikado turned around to fix Soma with a stern look. “You thought it was just going to be the two of us, and you brought a bag of chips that size? I hope you weren’t planning on eating them all.”
“Hey, I’m a college student, you know,” Soma answered through a mouthful of chips (to Arikado’s visible disgust). “I need to eat a lot in order to fuel my rapidly expanding brain. Obviously. Hey, how come Julius is driving?”
“Because-”
“Because Alucard is a wuss who hates driving,” Julius answered before Arikado could.
Arikado huffed. “Look, if you had to witness the invention of personal giant metal death machines that have different rules and mechanics with every decade and each different county, you wouldn’t enjoy it much either,” he insisted. “There is a reason I like taking the train. If you saw the car I learned to drive in, you would- if you’ll pardon the expression- shit yourself.”
“But Alucard! The metal death machines are a testament to humanity’s courage and ingenuity!” Yoko proclaimed dramatically. “Or something like that.”
“They are, and I don’t like them. And let me remind you, I can drive if I have to- I just don’t want to.”
“Whatever you say, grandpa.”
Arikado drew in a sharp breath; Soma couldn’t see Arikado’s face (nor did his lack of reflection make the mirrors any useful), but it was easy to imagine his usual tight-lipped frown of irritation. After a moment, he shook his head, and reached for a potato chip.
For a few minutes, there was quiet. Soma watched suburban Tokyo go by outside the window.
“So, Soma,” Yoko prompted as they waited at a stoplight. “Are you excited for your first official mission?”
Soma nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah! Although I’m not sure why it took this long,” he added, casting a glance at Arikado. “Considering everything I’ve been through, I think I can handle a vampire or two.”
“It’s not that I don’t think you’re capable,” Arikado replied. “It’s a matter of circumstance. You and I will both always be under a certain level of suspicion, and to be honest, the Agency doesn’t like that I’ve been training you. I chose this particular quest because there’s no vampires involved, and no connection to Dracula, so the risk of… agitating my bosses is minimal.”
Soma frowned. “You mean they still think I’m- what, going to go all evil mode or something?”
“People will always think that,” Arikado said apologetically. “Dracula did unspeakable things in Europe, and-”
“And how many of those assholes are actually European?” Julius interrupted. “They don’t know what the hell they’re talking about.”
Yoko gave a firm nod of agreement. “Yeah, and it’s ridiculous for them to treat you like a threat. You’ve been fighting Dracula for longer than any of us have been alive!”
“Not to mention, we never would have won the Battle of 1999 without you.”
“Look, I’m not the one you need to be telling this to,” Arikado pointed out. “Whether or not it’s fair, whether or not it’s rational, this is the world we live in. Certain precautions must be taken. I won’t put Soma at risk.”
An uncomfortable silence fell over the car at this. Soma turned away, feeling profoundly uneasy as he leaned against the window; Arikado’s words were a grim reminder of all the ways his life would never quite be what he wanted it to be, try as he might.
It wasn’t even that he wanted things to be “normal”- he couldn’t bear to lose any of the many odd friends he’d made since the eclipse. He simply hated the fact that despite the control he had over his dark side and his magic, Soma was still under suspicion. And Arikado, too… It wasn’t fair. With Dracula contained firmly within Soma’s very much non-murderous soul, it should have been a happy ending for everyone involved, yet the shadow of centuries-old conflict still hung heavy over all of them.
Arikado seemed to take notice of Soma’s unhappy mood.
“Cheer up, Soma. I’m sure you’ll find today’s mission worthwhile. Perhaps you’ll come home with an interesting story to tell Mina and your parents.” He paused a moment. “Actually, maybe don’t tell your parents.”
Soma couldn’t help but laugh slightly at that last comment. “Where are we going, anyway?”
“Did you not read the briefing I forwarded you?”
“Um… I sort of skimmed it?” Soma winced apologetically. “It was kinda dense and jargon-y, so…”
“That’s fair,” Arikado sighed.
“We’re going to Aikawa,” Julius answered in Arikado’s stead. “It’s a little spot in Kanagawa. Kind of a nothing town, to be honest. It’s got a pretty high immigrant population, but in terms of actual stuff, there’s really not much of anything there,” he admitted. “It’ll be about an hour and a half, if traffic is good.”
“We’ll stop for dinner somewhere,” Yoko added, in anticipation of Soma’s inevitable question.
“So what’s in Aikawa, then? What are we doing?”
“Aikawa is the home of an organization known as the ‘Church of Eternal Youth’,” Arikado replied. “And, as the name implies, rumor has it that its members stay young forever.”
Soma gave a thoughtful hum. “A church, huh… So they’re Christian, then?”
“Honestly, I’m not sure. Their leader- a man who goes only by the obvious alias of ‘Wakaichi’- claims to have been chosen by god to bear special healing powers, but doesn’t seem to specify which god,” Arikado explained. “Nor do their teachings mention figures you’d expect to find in Christianity, nor any other religion for that matter. No Jesus, no Moses, no Mohammed, no Buddha, just Wakaichi.”
“Oh, so it’s a cult,” Soma realized.
“Exactly.”
“Now to be clear, not all cults are necessarily supernatural,” Julius pointed out. “Most are pretty mundane. They’re all unfortunate, but not usually our problem.”
“Then given that this one apparently is, I’m guessing there’s more to it than just rumors,” Soma replied.
“Yep. Apparently, the Agency sent one of their guys to investigate, and he came back twenty years younger.”
Soma gave a quiet gasp. “You’re kidding… Is that really a bad thing, though?” he wondered.
“Of course it’s a bad thing! You can’t just go messing with the natural order like that,” Julius huffed.
“I mean, it’s definitely weird, yeah… But it’s not like they’re actually hurting anyone, right?”
“Actually, we don’t know that,” Yoko corrected him. “It’s unclear what kind of magic is being used here, so there’s no telling what the long-term effects will be. What if they age in reverse all the way down to nonexistence, or what if they start aging really fast one day? What if they up and die when their original lifespans are up?” She shook her head in dismay. “This kind of magic is dangerous. We can’t let someone just run around casting it on people willy-nilly.”
“On top of that, the psychological effects are dangerous for the entire community,” Arikado said. “The report from our investigator paints a bleak picture. Children being told that their youth is their greatest asset, adults who already look as young as twelve begging for more ‘healing’ because they think they saw a wrinkle…”
Yoko shuddered. “Like the beauty industry on steroids.”
“Pretty much. All living creatures age, so-”
“Except you,” Julius teased.
“Yeah, and lobsters,” Soma added in.
Arikado sighed. “Yes, except- wait.” He turned around to stare at Soma in bafflement. “Did you say lobsters?”
“Yeah, apparently lobsters can’t actually die of old age- they just keep growing until they’re so big that they collapse under their own weight,” Soma explained. “I read it online once.”
“That sounds made up. You shouldn’t believe everything you read online, Soma.”
“I’d believe it, to be honest,” Julius confessed. “Lobsters are kinda freaky.”
“I’m gonna google it,” Yoko decided, pulling out her phone.
Arikado huffed. “Look, the point is, dhampirs and allegedly lobsters nonwithstanding, all living creatures age. It’s normal, it’s fine, it’s nothing to freak out about. To make people feel so repulsed by a natural process that they would go to such lengths to-”
“Oh my god, it’s real!” Yoko blurred out, waving her phone around in excitement.
“What? You’re joking. That can’t be true.”
“No, it is, it’s a real thing,” Yoko insisted. “Something about their telomeres not degrading, apparently?”
“Called it,” Julius said, reaching for another potato chip.
For a moment, Arikado was quiet, seemingly stunned into silence.
“Wow. That’s… weird,” he said simply after a few seconds. He then cleared his throat, shaking his head. “W-Well, anyway. All that aside, there’s another reason why I take particular interest in this case.”
“Oh yeah? What’s that?” Soma wondered.
“The description given for this ‘Wakaichi’ is a perfect match for a man I met many, many decades ago.”
Soma’s eyes widened. “Really?! What happened?”
“You didn’t tell me that,” Julius noted, sounding just as surprised as Soma.
“Well now you have to tell us the story!” Yoko insisted.
Arikado chuckled quietly. “Very well, then. I suppose we’ve got a long ride ahead of us anyway.” He leaned back in his seat, humming thoughtfully. “Let’s see, when was it? I think it must have been around…”